Any good Marketing professional knows their “ABCs of Marketing”* — Ability to persuade, Businesslike demeanor, and of course, Coercion through bribery. Well, yesterday, in Lynchburg, Virginia, and Beckley, West Virginia, PETA’s Lettuce Ladies rocked all three of these important guidelines as they gave away free gas and vegan sandwiches to 100 people in exchange for a brief chat about the benefits of a vegan diet.

According to the Ladies, there were huge crowds gathered to take advantage of the freebies and find out what all the fuss was about after a news report announcing this unique demonstration, and they gave away hundreds of vegetarian starter kits to a very receptive audience, who were stunned to learn that eating just a single pound of meat is the environmental equivalent of driving more than 40 miles in a Hummer. Here’s what my friend and professional Lettuce Lady Colleen Higgins had to say about the experience: "In a time of rising gas prices and rising concern for the environment, we're going the extra mile to help Americans fill up on vegan fuel for their tummies and gas for their tanks." Good stuff.

*I just made these up.

Things could get really nasty here, and I can’t help but feel that we’re partially responsible. According to the celebrity gossip blogs (I read them so you don’t have to) Heroes hottie Kristen Bell has been sparring with her co-star Russell Brand about who’s really the sexiest vegetarian of the two. Here’s what Kristen had to say about the escalating battle on the set of Forgetting Sarah Marshall:

"Russell has been a vegetarian for the same amount of time as me. I've been a vegetarian for 17 years and we used to have little arguments because we were both dubbed Sexiest Vegetarian in the World. But I checked out the record books and his is only Sexiest Vegetarian in the U.K. I politely threw that in his face for most of the movie. He got to throw it back at me when I lost my title this year to Carrie Underwood and he kept his title in the U.K. So that's what I get for getting cocky about eating sexy vegetables!"

I’m not sure who has the strongest argument here, but for what it’s worth, I’m rooting for you, Kristen.

TheTailSection/CC

Jenna Jameson, modeling PETA’s “Kentucky Fried Cruelty” T-shirt in August

It’s a “tease” in the sense that the new ad we’re doing with Jenna Jameson isn’t going to be launched until March 10, as part of Los Angeles Fashion Week. But I can tell you that it evokes screen siren Bettie Page (think Jenna in a black wig and a pleather bikini), the tagline is “Pleather Yourself,” and it’s sexy as hell. Here’s what Jenna says about the ad, which was shot by celebrity photographer Gavin Bond:

"I've worn a lot of pleather in my life. Anybody who knows me knows that I've kind of lived half my life in it. I love the idea of having choices outside of leather. The outfit that I'm wearing in the ad is so sexy that I suggest if people want to have a better time in the bedroom — then please explore the pleather side."

Thank you, Jenna Jameson! And you can find some more information about great alternatives to buying leather (in addition to just, like, not buying it), right here. Be on the lookout for Jenna’s new ad on March 10—it’s kind of spectacular.

Alicia Silverstone’s wonderful ad is in some very impressive company in TV Guide’s “Best of 2007” viral video list, including two of the very greatest videos of all time (IMHO): Will Ferrell’s “The Landlord,” and Justin Timberlake’s utterly glorious “Dick in a Box.” For anyone who works in marketing, you’ll know that companies tend to use the term “viral video” for pretty much any visual media they can come up with (it tends to be more of a wistful hope than an actual description of the video in question), but some videos really are “viral”—i.e., millions of people watch them, post them on their blogs, and pass them onto their friends—and it’s a truly incredible experience to be involved with one.

You can see TV Guide’s full list here, and here’s a reprise of the stunning pro-vegetarianism PSA that took 2007 by storm.

The votes have been flowing in (seriously, it’s been a banner year for the Sexy Vegetarian Next Door contest), and we’re down to the top two chicks and the top two dudes. There are still two more days to cast your vote for the winner, so click one of the finalists below to hit up the voting page and crown one of these attractive herbivores North America’s Sexiest Vegetarian Next Door.

In related news, I’d like to take this opportunity to express my heartfelt appreciation to all the people who have been writing me in to win this contest.* Sadly, PETA’s employees are ineligible, so those votes will not be counted, but I’m truly humbled by this outpouring of support.

*Technically, nobody has actually done this yet.

The 2008 Sexiest Vegetarian Next Door contest is underway, and this year we’re doing things a bit differently. To spice things up a bit, we’ve pitted the nominees against each other in a bracket-style tournament, where the winner takes all. (“All,” in this case, being a free trip to Hawaii.) You can check out the smoking hot lineup of sexy vegetarian guys and gals here. Happy voting!

You know you’re sexy, but does the rest of the world? We’re still accepting nominations for this year’s Sexiest Vegetarian Next Door contest until January 15, when a team of hotness consultants led by PETA’s International Sexiness Coordinator Chris Holbein will be picking the 10 male and 10 female finalists to feature on our website. The two winners of the overall contest will be getting a free trip to Hawaii, so there’s more at stake here than just bragging rights. Click the image of Chris below (a sexy vegetarian himself, on occasion) for more info and to enter the contest.

USAToday/Creative Commons

This little saga started three or four months ago when First Daughter Jenna Bush was allegedly spotted chowing down on foie gras in a DC restaurant, and PETA President Ingrid Newkirk wrote her a very nice letter asking her to please not do that in future. Well, a couple of weeks ago, Texas Monthly asked her about the foie gras fiasco, and she denied that it had ever happened. In fact, she said, the only meat she ever eats is fish.

Which, as you might imagine, was all the invitation we needed to pen her another little missive, this time to congratulate her on her (mostly) compassionate diet and to suggest that if she can just bring herself to leave the sea life off her plate, we’d be glad to nominate her for next year’s World’s Sexiest Vegetarian contest (which, incidentally, her cousin Lauren won in 2003). So there you go — with her family’s noted abilities at getting people to vote for them, she’s all but guaranteed the coveted Sexy Veg title in ’08. If she can just swear off the sushi.

You can read Ingrid’s letter to Jenna here.

*Via Washington Whispers.

Oh, and in completely (like, completely) unrelated news, there was a cat vitamin recall this week. If you feed your cats vitamins, you should check this link to see if it affects you.

Following Houston's decision to ban Alicia Silverstone's sexy pro-vegetarianism PSA, one PETA Lettuce Lady took it upon herself to make a personal plea to Texas Governor Rick Perry to encourage Texans to go vegetarian. When the top "fattest cities" in America were announced this year, Texas had four cities in the top ten, so if there's anyone who needs a bit of urgent advice about a healthy diet, it's the good folks in the Lone Star State.

Texas, you've been a very naughty state. But nobody wants to hear that kind of talk from me when they can get it from a lovely Lettuce Lady. Check out the amazing video that the wonderful Nicole Matthews sent to Texas' governor today. How can you say no to this one, Rick?

Now that you've watched the video, please click here to sign our petition asking Governor Rick Perry to get on board with our "Go Veg Texas" Campaign.

Is it possible for the biggest name in burlesque, Dita Von Teese, to get any sexier? She’s already the spokesperson for MAC Cosmetics Viva Glam campaign, is the face of Frederick’s of Hollywood’s upcoming holiday catalog, and has graced the cover of Playboy, Harpers Bazaar, and Elle. In fact, I just looked up the word “sexy” on Wikipedia and there is no definition, just her picture.

For those of you who thought Dita couldn’t get any sexier, think again. She is lending her voice, among other things, to our new ABC campaign. Dita urges fans to "bone up" on their ABCs and, if they are considering adding a dog or a cat to the family, to adopt from a local animal shelter and be sure to get their new family member spayed or neutered.

And here are some exclusive behind-the-scenes images and video from the launch of the ad.

Update: Following the success of Alicia’s PSA, Sky News put together a wonderful retrospective of PETA’s many naked ads and protests over the past year. You can check out the picture gallery here.

The folks in Houston were severely deprived yesterday, when their cable provider decided at the last minute (literally) that it would pull Alicia Silverstone's super sexy new pro-vegetarianism ad, which had already been approved and paid for. Comcast Cable told us that they had banned the spot "because she is naked," despite the fact that the ad has already aired on numerous news programs worldwide. Besides, as PETA Vice President Dan Mathews pointed out in a staff meeting today, they showed Holly Hunter's naked ass on Saving Grace the other night, so, um, what's the problem here, Comcast?

We had picked Houston because it consistently ranks in the top ten least healthy cities in the country, so we figured they could use some good diet advice (honestly, who in their right mind would turn down friendly diet advice from the beautiful Alicia Silverstone?), but Houstonians need not despair. As PETA President Ingrid Newkirk puts it,

"Houston viewers can still go to PETA.org and get an eyeful, not only of the stunning Ms. Silverstone, but also of our free Vegetarian Starter Kit—chock full of delicious recipes—that will make them drool for an entirely different reason."

And finally, because I love it so much, here is the ad again. Alicia, you are gorgeous.

Alicia Silverstone’s Sexy Veggie PSA
Order a FREE vegetarian starter kit at GoVeg.com

Scantily clad in sexy pleather uniforms, high-heeled boots, and police hats and holding signs that read, "Animal Skins Are a Fashion Felony," PETA's pair of sexy "fashion police" are taking New York fashion week by storm. They’re handing out violation notices resembling citation tickets to fur-, leather-, and wool-wearers for "violating the code of common decency." This dedicated duo is staking out the shows at Bryant Park and anywhere else suspected violators—including designers—gather. And get this, at their first outing yesterday, they even gave a citation to the notorious pelt pushing fur hag Anna Wintour.

Here are a few pics of their first outing.

Unfortunately, they weren’t able to get a shot of them ticketing Wintour, but I like this shot of the hag getting a pie in the face in Paris a couple of years ago better anyway . . .

Ummm, OMFG. Think Wynona Ryder in Beetlejuice meets that scary 35 year old Hot Topic employee at the mall, and you’re on the right track to getting your head around our annual “I’m Too Sexy For Leather” contest.

Granted, I’m more of a Paul Frank flannel nightshirt kind of guy, but all joking aside, there’s no denying that all of these pics are super hot in their own way. . . Even for sticks in the mud like me who aren’t all that into dreadlocked dudes riding vintage bikes while wearing pleather pants and straightjackets.

Even though I work here, I didn't quite realize the full extent of the glory in store for the winner of PETA's World's Sexiest Vegetarian title. But Kevin Eubanks—this year's “Sexy Veg” co-winner with the stunning Carrie Underwood—learned exactly how prestigious his new title was last night, when Jay Leno and two dancing vegetables presented him with a lovely sash and tiara on The Tonight Show. And in case you're wondering—no, it does not get better than that.

Here's what Kevin told us when we informed him of his victory: "I'd like to thank everyone who voted for me. I hope this encourages people to eat better and to remember that animals are our friends and a key to a better environment. Not to mention, it's just cool!"

OK ladies and gentlemen, congratulations are in order. The votes are in and following an impressive week-long rally by Jay Leno, Tonight Show band leader Kevin Eubanks has been voted PETA’s World’s Sexiest Vegetarian man for 2007, while American Idol superstar Carrie Underwood has been voted World's Sexiest Vegetarian woman.

Well over 100,000 ballots were cast, and the other finalists include Milo Ventimiglia, Joaquin Phoenix, Kristen Bell, Bryce Dallas Howard, Jared Leto, TV Guide columnist Michael Ausiello and Maggie Q.

I’m sure Leno couldn't be happier about Eubanks' win. He mentioned the contest several times during the past week and said that he stopped by to vote for Eubanks, noting that he wanted Kevin to win to bring honor to the Tonight Show stage. And Tonight Show viewers logged on in large numbers, pushing Eubanks ahead of his competitors. I’m not saying Eubanks wouldn’t be up there in the rankings without it, but Leno’s repeated stump speeches had to have given him an edge. Leno even brought out some rather revealing shots from Kevin’s past to get viewers excited . . .

Bartcop/Creative Commons

Carrie Underwood, who is celebrating her second win as World's Sexiest Vegetarian—she also won in PETA's 2005 poll—is a lifelong animal lover. "I quit eating beef when I was about 13," she has said. "I do it because I really love animals and it just makes me sad. … I don't like to watch commercials where they have meat. It weirds me out."

Previous winners, in case you’re keeping score, include Prince, Natalie Portman, Shania Twain, Chris Martin, Andre 3000, Tobey Maguire, Josh Hartnett, Alicia Silverstone, and Lauren Bush.

Congrats Carrie and Kevin, from all of us at PETA. And Jay, how about a segment with both winners on the show?

The voting has officially opened. Last year, Veronica Mars' Kristen Bell took home the coveted prize of World's Sexiest Female Vegetarian, and Prince beat out some of the best-looking dudes in Hollywood to win the award for the guys. According to my source over in our Vegetarian Campaigns department, Heroes star Milo Ventimiglia has taken an early lead in the voting, and Bryce Dallas Howard, who's starring in this summer's Spiderman 3—which, if the box office numbers are anything to go by, everyone in the country has seen a couple of times already—is currently inching ahead in the votes for the ladies.

Remember, it's not that meat-eaters can't be sexy. It's just that they could be sexier. You can pick your favorite vegetarian celebrity by clicking here. I will be voting for Alyssa Milano. Multiple times. Just FYI.

Even if the cruelty of factory farming, the increased heart attack and cancer risk, and the environmental devastation caused by the meat industry don't convince you to go vegetarian, I'm certain that the prospect of being the sexiest smelling person in your office will sway you. According to a recent study published by the NIH,

Results of repeated measures analysis of variance showed that the odor of donors when on the nonmeat diet was judged as significantly more attractive, more pleasant, and less intense.

Hott! Scientists sure do know how to make stuff sound sexy when they want to. Unfortunately for me, my fragrant vegan odor doesn't have much effect on my female colleagues, since (as you might expect) pretty much all of the dudes in my office are rocking a nonmeat diet. But if you're looking for a way to make yourself stand out from the competition with the dreaded Valentine's Day holiday looming, it may be worth a shot. Just so I've got my bases covered—for those of you who are already vegetarian but still smell kind of funky, you can find a whole range of cruelty-free deodorants here.

Other than me, of course. The reason I ask is that PETA is holding a competition to find the hottest vegetarian "boys and girls next door," and this year, we’re sending the winners to Hawaii. We already have some pretty damn good-looking entrants, but there's still time (just 4 more days) to submit yourself or one of your vegetarian friends for consideration. On January 30, we'll narrow the pool down to 10 male and 10 female finalists, and open up the site for voting in February. PETA's International Sexiness Manager Christopher Holbein—whose finely honed hotness detector is legendary in animal rights circles—will be coordinating the judging committee, which means that you can be assured of a fair and accurate assessment. As a PETA employee, I'm excluded from consideration—so dudes, don't be shy about entering yourself or your friends, as there's actually a chance you might win.

Click here to learn more and enter.