This coat didn’t originally belong to Lindsay … or Masha Markova

I don’t know whether or not LiLo actually stole some rich chick’s fancy fur coat, as the blogs have been suggesting this week, but I can tell you that a lot of the stories about this seem to have missed the real crime here. According to The Superficial, which is where I get pretty much all my important news nowadays, this girl called Masha Markova is accusing Lindsay of running off with her $10,000 fur coat after a party. Apparently, Masha only found out that this was where her coat had gone when she saw pics of Ms. Lohan sporting it in OK magazine. As soon as I’d gotten finished weeping about poor Masha’s terrible experience, I asked PETA Vice President Dan Mathews what he knew about the story, and he forwarded me a copy of this e-mail that he sent to Masha Markova this morning. It makes for pretty good reading:

To: Masha Markova, c/o Merrill Cohen

Dear Ms. Markova,

We at PETA have read with interest about your distress over Lindsay Lohan supposedly stealing your fur coat. Has it ever occurred to you that neither you nor Lindsay are the rightful owners? That coat belonged to dozens of animals who were electrocuted, gassed, strangled, drowned or beaten to death just so you could try to appear wealthy. Ms. Markova, people who wear fur simply show that having money and style don’t go hand in hand. Please take 5 minutes to watch this video, hosted by former fur wearer Martha Stewart, who had a change of heart about wearing real fur when she saw what the animals go through. Perhaps you, too, will find your conscience and consider donating your fur coat to PETA, as have Mariah Carey, Kim Cattrall, and hundreds of others who don’t want animals to be fashion victims. We give them to the homeless, and you would even receive a tax credit for the donation. We look forward to your reply.

Dan Mathews
VP, PETA
http://www.petatv.com/tvpopup/Prefs.asp?video=martha

P.S. I just realized that I missed an opportunity for a bunch of “Lindsay Lohan showing off her fur in public” type jokes. Please accept my humble apologies for dropping the ball on that.

It's officially Spring (Allie and Lis, who sit at the desks next to me, are informing me that it has, in fact, officially been Spring for, like, two weeks already — so, I dunno, sorry for the old news. I've been busy, so I only just noticed.) Anyway, for anyone who's rocking a little Spring cleaning this April, it's worth remembering that PETA accepts donations of those hideous fur coats from straight out of the '80s that seem to lurk in closets and attics everywhere, waiting for just the right time to pounce. We mark them up so they can't be resold, use them in street-theater-style demonstrations, and give them away to the homeless, making the point that only those in desperate need have any excuse to wear fur. Ain't that just philanthropic as hell? By way of an illustration, here's an image from a recent demonstration outside a Burberry store conducted by my current favorite PETA affiliate, PETA Germany.