epets / CC

If you were paying attention to the news yesterday, you may have seen quite a few stories about PETA—apparently, we were quite busy!

The biggest story came from NPR, which reported on our efforts to save animals from the humiliation of having losing sports teams named after them. Our joint effort with the Humane Society, "Stop Teams Everywhere From Animal Mascots (STEAM)," has reportedly supported legislation in Michigan, Maryland, and Tennessee.

Meanwhile, Tor.com discussed our indecision regarding the Furry community (Animal-friendly? Unfriendly? Too-friendly?), and Aero-News.net announced our intention to seek $250,000 in damages (as well as an apology) for the geese killed in the "Miracle on the Hudson."

Our friends at ecorazzi highlighted Al Gore's new and non-environmentally-hypocritical line of organic vegan frozen foods—first up, "Al Gore's Vegan Nubs." And Groovy Vegetarian lamented the sad news that our president, Ingrid E. Newkirk, was caught chowing down on a Burger King Whopper.

Now, come on, people, you didn't really believe any of these stories, did you? I mean, everybody knows that we'd ask for way more than $250,000 … I kid, I kid. So, yes—we found ourselves the subject of a number of April Fool's jokes. And don't worry, we had our share of the fun too. C'mon—squirrel underpants? Pheromone-fueled hunter-targeting snake attacks? A Photoshop job this bad on a PETA ad?

I hope you all knew better than to fall for that one!

Posted by Amanda Schinke

So, Burger King has announced that it's releasing a cologne called "Flame." And no, it's not just for gay guys. They describe it as—get this—"the scent of seduction with a hint of flame-broiled meat." Yeah, because there's nothing sexier than grilled flesh … but wait, Jeffrey Dahmer isn't with us anymore, so who is this for?

Well, PETA likes this idea but thinks it doesn't go far enough. Why start at the grill? That's why we are launching our own fragrance called "GORE," with the tagline "Eau de Mort!' Take just one whiff, and you'll be reminded of who they're cooking over there in fast-foodville (or wearing, in this case). What exactly does it smell like? Meat, naturally! And, for authenticity, our scent even includes a maggot in each bottle, just to make the experience realistic.

So, how do you feel about GORE? It'd make a lovely holiday gift for any suspected necrophiliac.

Front of our GORE package.

Inside of our GORE package.

Posted by Lianne Turner

Burger King has announced a series of animal welfare improvements that put it right at the forefront of the fast-food industry in terms of holding its suppliers accountable for the way they treat their animals. As of today, the company will be requiring 2 percent of its eggs to come from hens who are not confined to battery cages, buying 10 percent of its pork from farms that don't use gestation crates, and rewarding suppliers that use "controlled atmosphere killing" (by far the most humane method available) instead of killing chickens by slitting their throats and dragging them through scalding tanks. These percentages, which amount to a huge number of animals, could be doubled by the end of the year.

These changes have been a long time coming. You may remember PETA's "Murder King" Campaign, which we called off in 2001 after the company agreed to make significant improvements in its standards, including conducting periodic animal welfare audits. Since then, PETA has been working behind the scenes with the company to improve conditions for the animals it uses for its restaurants. This new animal welfare plan makes Burger King an industry leader, and it sends a strong message to other fast-food companies (including one company which will remain nameless, but whose initials could stand for Killing Friendly Chickens) that are now going to have to play catch-up in a big way, which means good things for animals across the board.

For anyone whose reaction to this news is all, "WTF? That still means that 98 percent of BK's eggs come from battery cages and 90 percent of its pork comes from gestation crates," the short answer is that we're working on it, and that going vegetarian (and gently encouraging your friends to do the same) really is a fantastic way to opt out of all that unhappiness. But in the meantime, props up to Burger King for getting the ball rolling in a big way. Here are a few resources if you want some more info on this huge victory for animals:

• The New York Times Reports on the Story
• PETA's Victory Feature
• The History of the Murder King Campaign
• Extremely Cute Video With Pigs in It, Which Will Make You Give Up Pork Altogether if You Haven't Already
• Take the Veg Pledge

P.S. Burger King also has a veggie burger.