I would say the following:
Sir, I don't know if you're aware of this, but animals are being tortured in your establishment. I know I would not like to eat inhumanely killed fowl, and I'm sure you wouldn't either. If you could stop this cruelty, I promise to get more people eating at you're chain so you can make more money, but if you continue to torture the chickens... well, I hope you like decreasing profit, sir.

Posted by: Helana | April 15, 2009 09:59 AM

You reap what you sow.

Posted by: Rachel A | April 15, 2009 11:10 AM

Honestly, if I could vent my feelings on KFC to Colonel Sanders himself, this is honestly what I would say to him:

Are you aware of the conditions under which your chickens are raised and slaughtered?
If not, then you should be aware of the appalling conditions which these chickens must endure. You should also be aware that if you don't rethink your methods, you will loose business. There are people who do actually care about the welfare of living beings other than human beings. I would not even purchase a drink from your restaurant if I were parched and dehydrated and not only because of the treatment of the chickens that you slaughter and serve to the public. The type of food that you serve contributes to an overall decline of health and the increasing rate of obesity currently occurring in the general population.
Now, I do realize that you are a businessman and as such your main goal is to make money, but must you employ such methods as a means to your end?
To put it simply, in more ways than one – YOU'RE MAKING PEOPLE SICK - WAKE UP!

Posted by: Elspeth Grant | April 15, 2009 11:49 AM

(in southern accent) Now I don't know if your momma taught you to be all kinds of mean to poor little feathered birds, but I'm sure that's not how a southern gentlemen is raised. Those animals shouldn't be treated unkindly. I don't wanna hear how they're gonna die anyway, sure we'll all have our end someday, and the birds in your establishment will have theirs sooner than most - but that doesn't mean they should be tortured up until their final days. Give 'em some dignity and respect. We would all like you to stop killing 'em, but if the least you could do is treat them nicer like your momma would've wanted, than that's what we're asking you to do. Be a little more humane, and a little less human. We get such a bad rap afterall.

Posted by: Stray | April 15, 2009 12:36 PM

Dear Col. Sanders (even though you are not really a Colonel because you never even served in the Armed Forces, and why you named yourself a Colonel is beyond me):

By now everyone who eats at your establishment knows they are eating the corpses of small, defenceless tortured birds. Those who continue to eat there in spite of that fact are igornant, and those who work in your establishments are poor, untrained, non English speaking immigrants (in our area not even high school students will take fast food jobs). Your establishments in our area (Santa Ana, California) are filthy and the one and only time I did eat there I became ill from food poisoning.

Sir, I order you to improve both the conditions of the animals you kill and the restraunts you serve them in. I demand better paid, better trained staff, and higher hygenic standards; otherwise I predict what happened at McDonalds a few years ago will happen at KFC.

I will pray for your soul, sir.

Sincerely, Rev. Meg Schramm

Posted by: Rev. Meg Schramm | April 15, 2009 12:36 PM

Me- "Hey Sanders! I have this magic wand that can turn people into chickens!"
Colonel- "No way!"
Me- "Yeah I do but I can't turn anybody else cause I'm afraid you and your chicken killing army will hack them to pieces and serve them as food to people and who wants to eat a person?"
Colonel- "Holy crap! please tell me you haven't turned anybody into a chicken."
Me- "Actually I did, a few people wanted to see what it was like but your army came and took them away... so technically your customers have been eating human flesh!"
Colonel- "Oh my gosh, that's horrible!"
Me- "Yeah I feel the exact same way, only I feel it about all chickens, and by the way I don't have a magic wand but at least now you know how me and my PETA family feels about all of your tortured chickens."
Colonel- "Well that was a dirty trick, but my eye's have been opened and I have decided to sell only mock chicken in my stores"
**crowd roars**
YAAAYYYY NO MORE TORTURED KFC CHICKENS!!
=)

Posted by: Lindsey | April 15, 2009 12:53 PM

Tortured chickens taste like crap!!!

Posted by: Jackie Augenstein | April 15, 2009 01:33 PM

Mr Saunders, with all due respect you have taken the meaning of "choking your chicken" to a grotesque level I will not engage in this behavior because of you! Thanks alot with all due respect.

Posted by: CJ Riedel | April 15, 2009 01:38 PM

"Leave the chickens alone! PETA is watching you, and you can never ever get away with this chicken torture!"

Posted by: Niranjan | April 15, 2009 01:51 PM

You do realize, Helana, that Colonel Sanders died in 1980. >_>

Posted by: Nicholas Gibson | April 15, 2009 02:04 PM

I would say to the Colonel :'' Did you know that billions of intelligent social beings with nerve endings (just like you and your beloved ones ''sir'' have) are suffering an enormous unecessary deal for every buck your company makes?...then I'd make him watch ''meat your meat'' (I'd probably install him like the guy at the end of A Clockwork Orange to make sure he gets every single frame)...and then I'd tell him how incredibly great KFC's faux chicken burger is and try to convince him to only use faux chicken in every single KFC bucket...wouldn't it be nice to see the colonel ''get it'' and cry his heart out in the after life for the ugly monster he has created?...In the case where Sanders still wouldn't ''get it'' I'd ask ''God (or whatever's up there) to re-incarnate him as a KFC chicken and when his miserable short life would be over,I'd have him back in heaven to talk about every emotion he went through in the process.

Finaly,I'd re-incarnate him once more as the big boss at KFC and see the company become KFFC (Kentucky Fried Faux Chicken'').

...I know...my vision rocks!!!
;.)

Posted by: Stephane | April 15, 2009 02:29 PM

i would say

cournel,
you are one sick man, you know what you are doing with these animals and not changing!.
how would you feel if it was you? getting tourchered like this? you wouldnt like it,
being kept in a small enclosed box and getting drugs in you to make you grow faster
and your bones caving in on you and not being able too walk?
i used to eat at kfc and i havent for years but its shocking even more to find out
what iv been eating over the last few years.
Indeed you are aware of what you are doing so please stop as you will get more customers
and stop inflicting so much pain on these animals, all there doing is living but your taking that
away from them so painfully. im so shocked!
so yeah stop this as it will spread and loose so much customers, and you will feel better about
not tourchering these poor animals to make money for the company.

Posted by: Rebecca Bell | April 15, 2009 03:13 PM

It is beyond me when another living thing exploits another for a profit. I wish that all animals have the capabilities to poison their own meat, so they can never be enjoyed by another human being. KFC will fry in their own disgusting and inhumane treatments of all chickens!!

Posted by: Heidi Roberts | April 15, 2009 03:41 PM

A destruction, an annihilation that only man can provoke, only man can prevent.
Elie Wiesel

Posted by: Neilers | April 15, 2009 04:03 PM

Mr Sanders, Why does your company treat chickens the way it does? (Show him videos) Please stop Treating Chickens the way you do and start acting in a humane way.

Posted by: Jennie | April 15, 2009 04:25 PM

I would say to the Colonel: If I were to throw hot coffee in your face would you not feel intense pain and fear? That is what the chickens you scald alive feel before they die but it takes along time to die before they are set free from the fear and the pain you cause them for the sake of a burger or a wing. All living things no matter how small feel sadness, pain, love, and all living things feel fear, happiness and nothing deserves the cruel end that places like yours dish out. (No pun intended). So I say Colonel if you would not cause another human this cruel fate what gives you the right to do it to chickens or any other animals? I will not eat at your establishment and I will make sure that all my family and friends also boycott you until such time that you can provide a cruelty free way and better life for the animals you serve up. But vegatarian is much better. Just something to consider.

Posted by: Pamela | April 15, 2009 04:39 PM

Sir, you are to chickens what Hitler was to the Jews. Do you want to be remembered for being so evil? It's up to you.

Posted by: Joanne Woods | April 15, 2009 04:43 PM

dear Mr, Sanders.
I understand you have a large fast food buisneess under your belt, but fast food need not cause suffering onto other species for a pity profit. Do you have any other ideas on how to better your obviously cruelty to chickens problem? take some consideration into what i have said. maybe activists and press will pester you less.

Posted by: Mary freeman | April 15, 2009 04:49 PM

Colonel
Cruelty like that which is inflicted upon the birds that your company slaughters is perhaps beyond your self-centered comprehension. I can only hope that one day you too will be strung up by your ankles, slammed against a wall, and made to suffocate under the weight of hundreds of corpses.

Posted by: Heather | April 15, 2009 05:07 PM

I'd simply ask him to tour his chicken processing plant himself, then offer him a piece of his golden-friend nightmare whilst in the middle of it.

Posted by: Krystal | April 15, 2009 05:10 PM

Dear, Mr.Sanders.Do not hurt chickens. I'll dip you in a boiling hot bath tub and feed you drugs for the rest of your short little live.

Posted by: brooklyn | April 15, 2009 05:10 PM

Satan(I'm pretty sure that's you name),
We all know your dirty little secret-KFCruelty. We know it's no joke because PETA had footage of the torcher going on behind those KFC meals. We're letting the people who don't know your secret, so that you buisness will be "dead"...just like your cruel meals. Maybe this kind of torcher will make you want to throw yourself in the scalding water.
-Carley Pysher

Posted by: Carley | April 15, 2009 05:29 PM

Omgosh! There's blood dripping from your pristine white suit!
Here, let me help you clean it up in 3 EASY STEPS!
STEP ONE:
First, let's liberate the chickens from the megacorporation you sold out to.
Then, let's begin reversing all the massive environmental damages related to "KFC".
First, we can raze the coops ~ since nobody will be cooped up in them again! :-)
Then, we can plant sustainable crops on the lands!
Win-Win-Win!!!
Around the perimeters, we can have wide nature paths with access for all "paved" with chipped brush and trod flat by joggers and wheelers reclaiming their lives once on the brink of being stolen in the name of "mass marketing & bringing home a bucken of lovin'" (HA!)

STEP TWO:
With that end tidied up in Step One, we can turn toward the blight of "Urban Heat Island Effect" "KFC" has promulgated globally by razing those structures and their oceans of surrounding asphalt and installing circuit training courses at each former "KFC" instead ~ These NEW! IMPROVED! KFC locations AKA __KIND FOOD CENTERS__ will consist of a perimeter of "Square Foot Gardening" (Organic & Sustainable, of course!) around a center of simple exercise points made of naturally felled large dimension lumber & galvanized pipes! :-)
With all the central city locations turned to BETTERMENT ZONES, we'd turn to the off-ramp locations ~ transforming those into WELCOME places for weary travelers to replenish with wholesome freshly-picked goodness; add their apple cores and other in-vehicle debris to the compost piles; camp on the grassy area of the circut training spots; and, move along in the morning, leaving composting enrichment to compensate for the foods ingested/harvested for their own consumption! :-D
Now that Step One & Step Two are taken, we'll go to

Step Three:

Let's transfer your assets to P.E.T.A., where they can do the most good. We promise NOT to treat you as you've treated others. :-)

There! Now isn't that BETTER?

Posted by: Susana | April 15, 2009 05:31 PM

i would keep short and simple:
flip him the bird and say, "F*** you!"

Posted by: Erin Harmon | April 15, 2009 05:42 PM

Hey Colonel, Your secret recipe includes a murdered animal!

Posted by: Sue Jones | April 15, 2009 05:57 PM

Hey I would ask him if he wants to continue the cruelty and if yes I would slap him chop his nose off as he does their beaks and scald him alive and then run lol jk I would probably just tell him its wrong and show him so peta news lol

Posted by: Nevin S | April 15, 2009 06:04 PM

Dear Sir,

For someone whose identity is that of a southern GENTLEMAN - I find it confounding that you would support and ignore the continued suffering, torture and cruelty that generate the millions fueling your southern plantation lifestyle image.

Would it be more accurate and honest to show your pristine white suit covered in blood, feathers and fecal matter?

I am sure you wish to accurately reflect your opinions and actions so you might consider the bloodied stained suit.

May in NJ

Posted by: Megan | April 15, 2009 06:38 PM

I would request that KFC change its name from Kentucky Fried Chicken to Kindly Freed Chickens and stop selling real chicken!

Then I would ask him to put his 7 herbs and spices on a veggie chik'n meal! =D

Posted by: Nathaniel Ed | April 15, 2009 07:03 PM

Dearest Colonel's Sanders:

How would you like it if I forced you to live in a filthy, cramped cage? Then, when I am ready to eat you, I will take you and scald you alive while you are still conscious. Does that sound good to you Mr. Sanders?

Posted by: Erica Becker | April 15, 2009 07:22 PM

Of course asking him if he knew what was happening in his name would be a given. I would also ask him if he thinks if that is OK. I would also ask him what his children thinks about the torture of thousands of birds in their names. If I were related to him and had his name I would change it. I would feel ashamed of myself. And then I would ask him what his secret ingredients and herbs were so I could use them on Tofu. Kentucky Fried Tofu XD

Posted by: Sophiya | April 15, 2009 07:41 PM

There are two types people who walk this Earth. Those who boycott KFC and those who are about to.

Posted by: Kevin Liang | April 15, 2009 08:14 PM

The late Mr. Sanders is responsible for egregious and unpardonable animal genocide.

Posted by: Brien Comerford | April 15, 2009 08:24 PM

Mr. Sanders Your company is torturing helpless animals. If only you would stop it...

Posted by: Will | April 15, 2009 09:21 PM

Dear Colonel Sanders,
Have you ever been to a chicken factory farm? a chicken slaughterhouse? Could you ever have imagined that soon after you franchised KFC that factory farms would take over the landscape. Hellish places where billions of chcikens suffer immense cruelty to meet the production demands of millions of clueless consumers. Did you ever imagine what it's like for the chickens to fill your buckets? Maybe you were so fixated on success that you forgot about the animals right to live out their lives, free of cruelty and suffering. It's not too late to correct the shame of what is now your fried chicken legacy. Shut down KFC and save your soul before you die.

Remember angels have wings to fly and so do chickens, they do not belong in KFC buckets.

Posted by: veganartist | April 15, 2009 09:37 PM

I would say to him:

Do you think that chickens have no feeling? Do you think they're just some sort of robot? Well they're not. You, in the people with feelings world, would have not a single right to hurt a cute little living creature like that.
Think about this. Is it really fair?
I suppose that money is all humans want.
At least you're dead and you won't have to face the end of the world - that's the price we pay for KFC.

So much for the dollar meal...

Posted by: Ciara Lanza | April 15, 2009 09:47 PM

Sorry to inform you Colonel, but after a recent visit to a KFC provider slaughterhouse, I have uncovered what must be your secret herbs and spices.

Mixed in with the meat was a troublesome mix of feces, blood, puss, tears, urine, guts, and vomit.

No wonder you insisted on keeping your recipes secret.

Posted by: Brad | April 15, 2009 10:04 PM

KFC = Killing fracking chickens

Posted by: Cheri Anderson-Albert | April 15, 2009 10:50 PM

I'd sit him down, put my hand on his shoulder and say, "now prepare yourself, because you're not gonna like what I'm going to tell you about what's happened to your company...but here's how we can fix it..."

Posted by: Rosie | April 16, 2009 06:25 AM

Sir, You were an innovator in your time, serving what at the time was considered a wholesome affordeble meal to families. You made a fortune doing so.

It is time to be innovative again. A vegetable based meal, from an establishment that has proven its ability to deliver food quickly, is sorely needed. Become a part of this country's future instead of being a part of the disease, bacteria and antibiotic infected past.

Let me know when you're opening the first KFT (Kentucky Fried Tofu) and I'll be the first one in line.

(P.S. - Try adding Nutritional Yeast to the 11 herbs and spices!)

Posted by: Gordon | April 16, 2009 12:45 PM

what a hoot! i'd tell him to tell jim perdue to repent!!!

Posted by: jffryclough | April 16, 2009 04:58 PM

Good day Mr. Sanders,

I found this letter and would appreciate you taking the time to read it.

"I talked to my daughter today. I know she didn't want to go to camp, but I never thought she would resort to telling ridiculous stories to get out of it!

'Apparently' she has gotten quite chubby and believes the owners are trying to get her fat! She went on to say because she is so huge, she broke her legs while trying to stand up, "so, please mum come and pick me up!" That's my little drama queen (grins and rolls eyes).

Oh, there are many more...

People are going missing from camp, no where to be found and never returning.

Here's a good one.
Apparenlty the lodge next door turns all who enter insane! Ha! I know...
The residents go balistic, she says, and claw each other to death. She said that the owners even cut their noses off!

Here's one more for you before I have to go...
She told me there's rumor of the owners being serial killers who will drug you, skin you alive and then cut off your extremities- then they eat them! Yuck, I know! Where does she get this stuff?

Becki is so creative. Always has been, with that active imagination of hers.

Anyways, I'm leaving tomorrow to pick her up from camp...if she's still alive, LOL! I called her three days ago and she told me if I don't come to get her - that very minute - she will be dead by the time I arrive. *Sigh* I almost feel bad for making her attend camp this year, but it's good for her. The fresh air and other kids to play with will do her well.

Bye for now."

On a side note:
Becki was found, two days later in a dumpster behind the camp grounds. She suffered severe multiple lacerations to her face and body. Her neck was broken and it is believed she was in a lucid state for hours before being discovered. She died two hours later in emergency. The camp was found to have disgusting and dismal conditions, which wouldn't be fit for an even an animal. Feces were strewn about. Corpses were found rotting among the living quarters. Occupants were subjected to daily mental and physical torture. Many suffered from extreme, life-threatening infection due to their injuries. The camp is now closed, and the owners are due to attend court on charges of slaughter and indecency to a body.

I admit Mr. Saunders, this isn't a real letter. Infact, I made the whole thing up. But I wrote it in hopes you - after a moment of deep thought- might answer me one simple question:

Would you want your grandaughter going to this camp?

If not, please consider the parallel between this letter to your manufacturing facilities. Animals may not be capaple of mastering astrophysics or even forming a sentence , but they too have pain sensors and are capable of making bonds with others, human and animal alike. Just like you and me. Please prove you are a kind and humane man and reconsider your method of practice.
I know you are.

Thank you kindly for your time.

Posted by: MB | April 16, 2009 05:03 PM

Mr Sanders, I just wish that you could see what your simple idea for chicken dinner has become. I believe it got a little? out of hand.
Lord Mr. Sanders, what have you done?
OYE VAY!

Posted by: Lisa L | April 16, 2009 06:02 PM

I would simply say......."May the Bird of Paradise Fly Up Your Nose!". :)

Posted by: Chad Boyd | April 16, 2009 06:25 PM

i'd say, colonel, think how good those secret herbs and spices would taste on tofu

Posted by: christopher h | April 16, 2009 06:34 PM

not much of a gentleman are you...have you driven behind the traps those chickens are tortued in? I f i won that bobblehead I would flick your head back and forth like you crack their necks and put it on my work desk to remind others not to eat at your establishments...besides the last time I ate years ago I was hospitalized for food posioning- yep true- in the 90's in vegas- totally sick and needed an iv- never ate there again

Posted by: SANDY | April 16, 2009 07:59 PM

KFC = Kentucky Fried Cruelty!

Posted by: Robert D | April 16, 2009 08:26 PM

I would say, I'm sure that you are unaware of this but the nice little restaurant you used to have when your were alive has turned into hundreds of chain fast food restaurants that show anything other than good ol' southern hospitality.
Back then your chickens probably lived in a nice spacious coop with fresh air but to day things are different. The chickens are forced to live in dark cramped rooms where they can barley move and are forced to live in their own filth. The fumes are overbearing and the farmers may kill ten a day just for the joy of it. Like for using thier blood to write with. When it's time for them to be killed they are boiled alive, stomped on, thrown against wall, and thats not even all of it. Now that great ol' KFC uses employees who bath in the sinks, and scrap food out of the trash and serve it to customers. They are not hardworking people who love thier jobs like you would want. the truth is that your little restaurant has changed for the worse and the millions of chickens that suffer each day, arnt to happy either

Posted by: BJ | April 16, 2009 09:04 PM

Dear Mr Sanders.
I like to keep this letter as short as possible. You must be busy making money.
Here is my suggestion:
Try out this treatment yourself.

Just once

Posted by: Susanne Rainwater | April 16, 2009 09:45 PM

I'd bet you would taste good fried too, Colonel Sanders!

Posted by: WENDY HORN | April 17, 2009 02:45 AM

Sir,

I do declare...that I've NEVER spent a dime in your store and I NEVER will until you drastically change and improve the way you handle chickens for your company.

Posted by: Kelly Jones | April 17, 2009 08:52 AM

I hope you met McChicken in heaven or hell,wherever you are.

Posted by: Linda | April 17, 2009 07:27 PM

well KFC is the old time chicken place, I'd remember meeting him when I'd was extremely young while, I'd was growing up in greater Miami, Florida, please sign me up

Posted by: mary teneyck | April 17, 2009 11:31 PM

Would you care for a two headed, boil, puss filled, one winged, hobbled piece of Frankenchicken, Sir? Would you like to Super size that?

Posted by: Mary B | April 18, 2009 01:52 PM

Rest in Peace

Posted by: Toby | April 20, 2009 04:51 PM

i know your secret.

Posted by: Vicky Boackle | April 20, 2009 09:41 PM

You are a very evil and nasty ma. However, you have an awesome beard.

Posted by: Alex | April 21, 2009 05:58 PM

I get the feeling that you're a chicken hawk & you're favorite part of the boy is the skin because you find it finger lickin' good.

Posted by: J Chaborek | April 24, 2009 06:27 PM

I'd rather take a bite out of the Colonel's rotting body than eat at on of those pathetic torture chains.....

Posted by: gerald estep, Jr. | April 26, 2009 07:22 PM

Terrific

Posted by: Leslie Rathbun | April 27, 2009 10:00 AM

Are chicken tears one of the secret ingredients? Or does torture bring out the natural flavors?

Posted by: Justin Gall | April 27, 2009 07:20 PM

Dear Mr. Sanders,

Your judge and jury is now our Lord, but shame on you for getting filthy rich by killing innocent animals.

Posted by: Deb K | April 27, 2009 11:18 PM

I would tell him that if you cannot respect that which gives you life, then your life is one that should not be respected. How you obtain your wealth in this life is not saying much of your character if it's by being cruel to any living creature. Even more so when it's a creature that is less fortunate and has no way to defend itself. If you condone these things, you should be ashamed.

Amy
MovieMomma@gmail.com

Posted by: Amy Bradshaw | April 28, 2009 03:55 AM

Hey Colonel,

If everything taste like chicken, then why don't you hop you big a** in the deep fat fryer?

Posted by: Gary W. | April 28, 2009 05:05 AM

I would love the chance to win, thanks.

Posted by: Erma | April 28, 2009 07:59 AM

It's not way better than fast food - it's cruelty.

Posted by: Nicole D. | April 28, 2009 09:10 AM

This is not humane.

Posted by: Ann | April 28, 2009 12:00 PM

Full of hormones and steroids - no thanks!!

Posted by: Penny Pavlicka | April 28, 2009 05:20 PM

i'd love to pluck you Mr. Sanders

Posted by: reeva | April 28, 2009 08:15 PM

If I won the bobble head, I could flick Col. Sanders on the head constantly and take my frustration out on it.
This would make me feel some what better about all those poor birds.

Posted by: Val Gand | April 29, 2009 02:39 AM

I don't believe it -- a Harlan Sanders' bobblehead!

Posted by: Joseph Perozzi | April 29, 2009 03:01 AM

good contest

Posted by: paul m | April 29, 2009 07:02 PM

I would say that Im not asking them to go vegetarian.
But the way in which the animals are tortured for the profit of his company, is so cruel, and ridiculous. With all the money KFC gets, Im sure that they could compromise and find a way to treat the animals better. Its matter of lazyness, and just not giving a damn. And thats absurd.

Posted by: Melani | April 29, 2009 07:38 PM

Coronal,
I'm sure that this collected brutality that has taken over your establishment is not what you wanted it to be. You started it with good intentions and great expectations . It has turned into a bloody massacre that millions of times a month, over and over, puts your spirit at shame. I wish you would stop, look, soak in the awareness, then change it into the entity you could still be proud of.

Posted by: Gary Emes | April 29, 2009 08:16 PM

My 7 and 4 year olds said they would tell him his they will neve ever eat there again and that he is a mean old man.

Posted by: Catherine KingChuparkoff | April 29, 2009 08:41 PM

ty 4 the entry into this awesome giveaway:)

Posted by: Janet | April 29, 2009 09:06 PM

When your heirs are being judged for these actions, how do you wish they are treated??

Posted by: Brigitte | April 29, 2009 09:21 PM